Mirage
by MacKynzie62
Summary: Ryan wants to make it work with his mom, but at what price?
1. Default Chapter

Hi everyone! This is set sometime while Theresa is still staying with the Cohen's, but she's not pregnant. -- MacKynzie  
  
P.S. They are so not mine, but how I wish they were!  
  
Summary: Ryan wants make to make it work with his mom, but at what price?  
  
Mirage  
  
Dear Mom,   
  
When we moved from Fresno, you said life could only get better. It took a little while, but, yeah, life has gotten better. I wake up in this awesome home, the ocean is my backyard. I have a family now, people that care if I don't eat or have trouble in school. When I first moved in with the Cohen's, I had a hard time getting the hang of this whole "family" thing. It was rocky for all of us at first, but I think we're all learning as we go. I love you mom, but I can't stay with you and I can't see you anymore. I won't continue the Atwood tradition of jail and an early death. I'm sorry about that, but you need a life of your own, right? Isn't that what you always say to me? Now you have your chance, good luck.  
  
Love,   
  
Ryan  
  
Ryan reread his words, satisfied. They were written on a day-old pizza box, the red smear of sauce reminding him of the red smear his own sauce had made that day. He grabbed his backpack, barely glancing at the lifeless body on the rotting sofa.   
  
Ryan moved through the kitchen and into the single bedroom, hefting his bag on this shoulders. Dawn lay sprawled on the bed, a tourniquet still tied on her bicep. He shook his head, he'd tried. There was nothing more he could do. If only I could believe that.   
  
He stared at her for a moment more, trying to convince himself that this was the right decision. That he hadn't just betrayed his family, his mother; the one who had given him life and for better or worse kept a roof over his head. Ryan sighed, he seemed to do that a lot lately. Quickly, he spun on his heel before he changed his mind. He had to get back before the Cohen's noticed his absence. It would be tricky, it was already 6:00 a.m. Sandy rarely woke later than 6:30.   
  
A horn honked. The cab was here, he'd have to pay the driver extra to step on it. Seth was getting suspicious what with his supposed early-morning walks and nodding off in class. Of all people, Ryan had thought that Sandy would have busted him weeks ago but then again, Sandy had been busy lately and Ryan was a very convincing liar when he had to be.   
  
He breezed through the living and out the front door, it was time to go home.  
  
Ryan lit a cigarette as they sped through Newport. He blew smoke out at his reflection on the window. His face was expressionless, his jaw set in determination. He hadn't cried since the third grade and yet he felt an overwhelming need to sob like a school girl. School girl. Theresa. She knew. She'd known for awhile, she knew him better than anyone. She knew those countless times when he'd shown up at her house with a busted face and nothing to say except that he'd fallen. Again.  
  
And he really had fallen this time. Lying to the Cohen's, to Theresa, to himself. Telling himself that things would be different. That his mom would be different. That he would be different. No such luck. Life sucks.  
  
Ryan raised a hand in greeting at Jack, the guard in the security booth. They had become quite friendly since his late-night ventures. He flicked his cigarette out the window and popped a breath mint. A poor cover, but it would work until he hit the shower and washed away the filth from the night.   
  
"This is good." Ryan stated, still quite aways down the street. He paid the driver and started trudging down the street. Ryan approached the house and walked around to the back. He eyed the windows, hoping not to see anyone in the kitchen. He didn't. And if he would have been more awake and not had a pounding headache he would have spied Sandy lounging on the chaise.  
  
"Well, well. The prodigal son returns." Sandy forced a light tone, but failing to hide the undercurrent of anger. "Where were you?"  
  
"For a walk. I couldn't sleep. Didn't you see my note?" Ryan said calmly. He'd been caught off guard, but old habits die hard.   
  
Sandy eyed him closely. He sensed something was off, but he didn't think Ryan would lie directly to his face. He was wrong, of course.  
  
"No, I didn't see it." Sandy stated, his instincts were whispering in his ear.  
  
Ryan shrugged, hoping Sandy wouldn't notice his backpack, which he had slipped off his shoulder and into the bushes at the last second.  
  
"Sorry. I didn't mean to worry you, I put in on the counter." Ryan explained, his voice sincere.  
  
"Okay. Didn't mean to accuse you of anything, it's just that I'm not used to this. Well, I better be off to the old grind. See you tonight." Sandy said, getting off the chaise and going back into the house.   
  
Since Sandy already knew he was up, he didn't see the need to shower in the pool house. Theresa had covered for him enough and she didn't need anymore stress. Ryan sighed. It was unusual to have some sort of parental unit actual care where he was or whether he was home. And he was home. It was something he still hadn't gotten used to.  
  
The end for now, more to come. Love it/hate it/could care less? Let me know.  
  
MacKynzie 


	2. The Night Before

A/N: Hey guys! This chapter takes place the night before the first one. (I'm going backwards.) Get it? Okay, so that's settled and on with the show!  
  
Mirage  
  
The night previous…  
  
"Jesus Christ, Ryan. What the fuck is up with you? I can't keep covering for you! The Cohen's are going to kick us both out." Theresa paced back and forth, unrelenting.  
  
"I know, I know. Look, I'm sorry. It'll just be a little longer, I swear." Ryan held his hands out, trying to placate her.  
  
"A little longer." Theresa smirked. "She knows how to hook you, I'll give her that. Why are you doing this? For her no less? You are so easy."  
  
"Fuck, Theresa. Don't you think I know that? She's my mom. You'd do the same for your mother. She needs me." Ryan responded, burying his face in his hands, his sleeve riding up.  
  
"What the fuck is this?" Theresa's voice had changed. Ryan looked up to see her striding purposely towards him. She stood in front of him. Theresa yanked his sleeve and grabbed his arm.  
  
"Oh, you have got to be fucking kidding me! She's burning you!" Theresa exclaimed, her fury reaching a new height.  
  
"Let it go, Theresa. It's none of your business." Ryan said quietly, ripping his arm out of her grasp.  
  
"None of my business, none of my business? We're best friends, Ryan. Or at least we used to be. So excuse me for caring that your mother is putting her cigarettes out on your hands!"  
  
"It's not like that Theresa. You don't know what you're talking about." Ryan protested. Unconsciously staring at his hands and forearms that bore his mother's imprint.  
  
"Oh, your little tests of manhood? That makes it okay?" Theresa practically shouted. Ryan stared at her, disbelieving. Theresa smirked at his expression.  
  
"You'd be surprised what Trey babbles on about when he's trashed."  
  
"Whatever, Theresa. Look, I can handle this. She just needs to get back on her feet. We can make this work." Ryan stated, weariness creeping into his voice.  
  
"Who are you trying to convince, Ryan?" He looked away, knowing she was right. He had to end it with his mom. Unless he wanted to go to jail or a wooden box, that life had nothing for him. He made one last go at it.  
  
"She's my mom."  
  
"No she's not. She's a little girl that got strapped with two kids and a deadbeat husband. You know what? My mom would never ask me to throw away the greatest thing that's ever happened to me. My mom wouldn't make me give her every dime I had for her next fix!" Theresa retorted, her words reaching a new crescendo.  
  
"Hey guys--?" Seth bounded in, skidding to a stop. It didn't take an Einstein to feel the tension in the room. "Am I interrupting…?"  
  
"No, Seth. We're done. What's up?" Ryan stated, standing up and effectively blocking out the fuming Theresa.   
  
"Dinner's ready." Seth stated slowly, looking from one to the other.  
  
"Go. I'm not hungry." Theresa snapped, spinning on her heel. The bathroom door slammed shut.   
  
Ryan looked after her. He shook his head trying to forget the truths she had flung in his face. It was his mother after all. His mother. Just because she had no clue. Just because her life was easier. Just because her mother never left her kids alone for days at a time with no food and no money. Just because…   
  
"Ryan?" Ryan's head snapped around. Seth was still standing there. He frowned and shrugged in the direction of the bathroom.  
  
"Must be PMS." Ryan stated matter-of-factly. He started towards the main house. He was hungry and he would need a full stomach for tonight.  
  
"Oh, yeah, I'm sure…" Seth trailed off and followed Ryan into the house. Crossing the pathway, he glanced back. He would definitely be talking to Theresa later. Something had been going on with Ryan lately and he planned to find out what.  
  
"Good meal, huh, boys?" Sandy Cohen asked exuberantly. Seth looked up from the desert he was working on.   
  
"Well, yeah, Dad. You can't go wrong with Chinese takeout."  
  
"This is true." Sandy laughed. "I gotta finish up some work. Your mother should be home around 10:00."  
  
"Okay." Seth yelled around a mouthful of pie. Ryan glanced at Seth from the pile of dishes he was washing.  
  
"You know, Seth, you could help me out here." Ryan said facetiously.   
  
"Yeah, well, Ryan, I believe we have already discussed this. You're the brawn and I'm the brains. And right now my brain desperately needs this infusion of apple pie. Geez, do I have to tell you everything?" Seth whined, barely understandable.  
  
Ryan grinned, biting his cheek. Seth didn't need any encouragement.  
  
"So, what's up with you and Theresa? I mean you guys looked pretty intense there."  
  
"Nothing, Seth." The pair looked up as Theresa stepped through the patio door. "Ryan, here, has some personal issues that he needs to work out." She announced, heading for the open cartons of food.  
  
"Okay…And this is news?" Seth stated, ignoring the daggers Ryan was shooting at him.   
  
Ryan threw the towel he was using onto the counter. "Enjoy your chat. I'm going to bed." He threw a glare Theresa's way and stalked out of the kitchen.  
  
"What's up with him?" Seth questioned, serious now. Theresa shook her head.  
  
"Why don't you ask him about his mother." She spat the last word out. "Good night."  
  
Seth shook his head. "Drama, drama, drama."  
  
Love it/hate it/let me know. More to come. I promise. Really there will be more. Geez, do you people ever let up?!  
  
MacKynzie 


End file.
